Yamada, Mamoru (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
thestudyof) wrote2024-05-05 10:43 pm
thestudyof) wrote2024-05-05 10:43 pm
[Story: Magic]
Tarou never felt better, really.
With the help of Onni to give him a powered exoskeleton that he could manifest-- okay, we couldn't beat around the bush: the ability to become a Kamen Rider-- he was as giddy as one could really be, given the circumstances. Something about living out things he enjoyed as a child, while also being strong enough to withstand the elements and remove the marks left by Chacu Challhua, it was really just a perk overall, wasn't it?
Of course, being awake was preferable, at this point. Being awake in any case was better. But eventually, he had to sleep. And his sleep was unsteady, even with the assistance of sleep aids.
When he slept, he had nightmares. Constant, unending nightmares. Guilt, pain, the sensation of disassociating and seeing himself taking that offer, remembering what he did...
Even if he dressed up like a hero, he would always feel like the villain, and his sleep would remind him of that.
"Anyway, that's why I'm here today! To talk some things out."
Tarou said that casually, like it wasn't a huge deal, but the person opposite of him was covering his face with his gloved hands, groaning.
"Why was I your first choice? How exactly did you get into my house, anyway?" Mamoru did not expect this type of guest when he came home from work to grab some food for the rest of the day, and was thankful that Akira was still out at the lab, doing a test with Lulu, but he didn't exactly have the ability to kick his doppelganger out, aside from calling the police. Which was something he really didn't want to deal with at all right now, when he had a time limit.
"You left the door unlocked! It was actually a bit strange, but I took the serendipitous opportunity as much as anyone could." Tarou said that cheerfully, but Mamoru frowned slightly. Akira was the last one to leave earlier, so... well, nevermind that thought.
"Did you ever consider that maybe I don't want to talk to you? Ever?" "I'm hurt, my dear whatever-we-settle-on-here, I've done nothing but try to help!" "By trying to attack me and risk metal shooting out of my chest. Which you, yourself, admitted afterward, would've just killed me."
Tarou rubbed the back of his head, sheepishly. "Well, I'll admit, I didn't expect the effect of your possession to be triggered by a physical element, but my intentions were truly to help!" "At least before you tried to replace me." "A minor technicality! It's more likely our consciousnesses would've merged in some fashion. If we had a more similar mindset, it'd have gone smoothly! But, well--" Tarou noticed how much more annoyed Mamoru was becoming, as he tried to taper off from the topic. "-- it's no longer on the table, anyway. I've found some alternatives to help keep my existence going." He rubbed at his arm, where the scars from the mark still remained.
"Which is why I want to talk things out. I feel like... a part of the reason these nightmares keep continuing is because I never really tried to make proper amends with you. Not for what I tried to do, or what Chacu Challhua intended on doing. And... It's better to ensure there's no regrets for anything like Chacu Challhua to prey upon."
Mamoru peeked past his hands. "Do you think that thing will come back? Try to make due on it's threat?"
"I don't know! It's one of those things where-- you keep expecting the other shoe to drop, but everyday that it doesn't, it just builds that anticipation more and more! Even if it never does, I'm never going to be able to rest!" Tarou mussed at his already messy hair, anxiously. "What's worse is, it isn't necessarily me that has to worry about it! Just because nothing has happened to me, it doesn't mean it might not happen to someone else, be it you or Akira, or--"
Mamoru held up a hand, prompting Tarou to stop. "Don't remind me of the threat here. I think it's clear whatever is happening with me will likely cause that "god" to think twice about trying to take a hold of me. But... I spend enough time worrying about Akira without you bringing it up."
"I guess it'd be off-color to ask then about the apparent "possession" issue he's having, too?" "I never said he was possessed." "You certainly got dodgy the last time it was brought up, but you're also speaking to someone who set up a massive exorcism circle to free myself from a dark god. Maybe doing something to actually help will kill two birds with one stone here."
Mamoru grumbled a little. This was not how he wanted his lunch hour to be. But... ... well, it isn't like he had a lot of choices when it came to this, huh. And he knew first-hand that Tarou wasn't lying about his own expertise. This should be a lot smaller, right?
"... if I said he was possessed, what would you do?"
"Well, my first move would be to ask if you knew what type of possession. If it's some errant spirit who's latched onto him, if you know of a conduit, how long it's been happening-- you know, little, simple details like that!" Tarou had already produced a notebook from who-knows-where, writing things down. "When I know more about it, I'll be able to create a proper sigil to match the purpose of this. After all, the only reason my exorcism didn't affect you, despite being pretty close to the Ground Zero of sorts, is because it didn't actually match your ailment! Not that I knew at the time, but all a learning process."
Mamoru sighed at the explanation. He was too excited about this, for him... but it was a little nostalgic, too. "It's like programming, isn't it? At least the type of magic you're performing here-- you have to know the functions that you want, the routines and subroutines, the result intended, and then you have to refine it. Right?"
----
"Isn't that right?" Akira spoke aloud. It was a rare moment that he was alone-- the test had gone well enough, but it had overloaded the system, so Akira had chased Lulu away so he could fix the AI. But he had a bit of company... in a sense.
"Yes, you understand the concept of how my "magic" works. I guess the idea isn't too far-fetched, once you accept the possibility, right?" A voice was coming out from the phone next to Akira-- or well, what he thought was the phone. Instead, the voice was in his own mind, channeling and filtering his perception. But the things Ren had to do to keep up the illusion...
"I'm surprised you asked about magic, though. You never seemed like the sort to be interested, right? How did you think I knew anything about it?"
"It was more of an impulse, but you just seemed dodgy and mysterious enough to have some sort of clue about it." "I'm hurt my that description, but I'll accept it all the same."
Ren leaned back in his seat, in the far-off location he was in, gesturing a little with his hand as marks appeared on it. "You might not be able to see it, but I'm doing "magic" right now. Programming and refining what I have in front of me, simply to make things more efficient. I already know what I want it to do, after all. But improvement is constant. I'm able to figure out more ways to reduce the "load", to spend less energy doing what I want. And it allows me to push more to do more, instead."
"Can anyone do magic?"
"I don't know, do you believe enough in magic to do it yourself?"
Akira twisted the screwdriver to tighten one of the screws, making sure the suspension on the AI machinery was still good. "I'm interested enough in it. Especially ever since she gave me that weird sequence-- it looked similar to one of the files that uncle has in the system, actually. Something about "dark games". But more... refined?"
"Given what you told me about that person, taking to heart what she's given you is maybe not the best of decisions." "I don't know, I'm still talking to you, aren't I?" "Once again, hurt at the assertion. But that's besides the point." Akira put down the screwdriver, cricking his neck a bit, getting up and stretching. But he was only half-aware that at this point, Ren had taken some control of his body.
"If you want to do "magic", you have to have a baseline to start from. For example, what's something small you want to have happen? What would you want to achieve?"
"Well, I guess I wouldn't mind some way to reinforce the machinery... it's a bother that the system's constantly overloaded whenever we do more intensive testing. But you said small, right? Maybe... something to make sure the bolts will stay tight, until I want them to be untightened?"
Ren let out a good-natured laugh. "Well, that's at least something small enough to start. Now, take a deep breath, and focus your hand. I can see about giving you a bit of help here--"
----
"-- I can give you some help here, with these details. Though you're sure you don't want to learn how to do this, yourself? Given, well, everything, you'd be a natural at this!"
Mamoru, whose patience was already pretty thin, shook his head. "I'm not interested adding on a skill like that quite yet, let alone from you. I'm not even sure if I can trust you, yet. But I don't have a lot of options to help Akira... and from what I can tell, any attempt to make him aware of this will go poorly. But..." He rubbed his chin a bit.
"He knows you tried to attack me. He already thinks poorly of you. If you approach him and do this, whoever is possessing him won't think of it as being cornered. Akira will instead think that you're just being hostile."
"You know, considering I'm still on probation, that isn't really the best of approaches, now is it?" "I'll make sure to explain to your parole officer about the situation." "That really puts my mind at ease, sure."
Even with their voices, their mannerisms being so different, their tones took on the same weary sound. But one thing was clear.
They wanted to help Akira, and Mamoru was willing to at least let Tarou have a shot at that.
"You do know, of course, that if you agree to do this, Akira will likely never forgive you, right?"
Tarou sighed a bit at that reality, rubbing his head. "He already seems like the type who won't forgive me for attacking you in the first place, right? Let's just call this the breaking off point. If the last thing I can do for him is to free him from the possession he's undergoing, well... What more could I ask for, for my nephew?"
"Long as you understand that.
Now get out of my house."
With the help of Onni to give him a powered exoskeleton that he could manifest-- okay, we couldn't beat around the bush: the ability to become a Kamen Rider-- he was as giddy as one could really be, given the circumstances. Something about living out things he enjoyed as a child, while also being strong enough to withstand the elements and remove the marks left by Chacu Challhua, it was really just a perk overall, wasn't it?
Of course, being awake was preferable, at this point. Being awake in any case was better. But eventually, he had to sleep. And his sleep was unsteady, even with the assistance of sleep aids.
When he slept, he had nightmares. Constant, unending nightmares. Guilt, pain, the sensation of disassociating and seeing himself taking that offer, remembering what he did...
Even if he dressed up like a hero, he would always feel like the villain, and his sleep would remind him of that.
"Anyway, that's why I'm here today! To talk some things out."
Tarou said that casually, like it wasn't a huge deal, but the person opposite of him was covering his face with his gloved hands, groaning.
"Why was I your first choice? How exactly did you get into my house, anyway?" Mamoru did not expect this type of guest when he came home from work to grab some food for the rest of the day, and was thankful that Akira was still out at the lab, doing a test with Lulu, but he didn't exactly have the ability to kick his doppelganger out, aside from calling the police. Which was something he really didn't want to deal with at all right now, when he had a time limit.
"You left the door unlocked! It was actually a bit strange, but I took the serendipitous opportunity as much as anyone could." Tarou said that cheerfully, but Mamoru frowned slightly. Akira was the last one to leave earlier, so... well, nevermind that thought.
"Did you ever consider that maybe I don't want to talk to you? Ever?" "I'm hurt, my dear whatever-we-settle-on-here, I've done nothing but try to help!" "By trying to attack me and risk metal shooting out of my chest. Which you, yourself, admitted afterward, would've just killed me."
Tarou rubbed the back of his head, sheepishly. "Well, I'll admit, I didn't expect the effect of your possession to be triggered by a physical element, but my intentions were truly to help!" "At least before you tried to replace me." "A minor technicality! It's more likely our consciousnesses would've merged in some fashion. If we had a more similar mindset, it'd have gone smoothly! But, well--" Tarou noticed how much more annoyed Mamoru was becoming, as he tried to taper off from the topic. "-- it's no longer on the table, anyway. I've found some alternatives to help keep my existence going." He rubbed at his arm, where the scars from the mark still remained.
"Which is why I want to talk things out. I feel like... a part of the reason these nightmares keep continuing is because I never really tried to make proper amends with you. Not for what I tried to do, or what Chacu Challhua intended on doing. And... It's better to ensure there's no regrets for anything like Chacu Challhua to prey upon."
Mamoru peeked past his hands. "Do you think that thing will come back? Try to make due on it's threat?"
"I don't know! It's one of those things where-- you keep expecting the other shoe to drop, but everyday that it doesn't, it just builds that anticipation more and more! Even if it never does, I'm never going to be able to rest!" Tarou mussed at his already messy hair, anxiously. "What's worse is, it isn't necessarily me that has to worry about it! Just because nothing has happened to me, it doesn't mean it might not happen to someone else, be it you or Akira, or--"
Mamoru held up a hand, prompting Tarou to stop. "Don't remind me of the threat here. I think it's clear whatever is happening with me will likely cause that "god" to think twice about trying to take a hold of me. But... I spend enough time worrying about Akira without you bringing it up."
"I guess it'd be off-color to ask then about the apparent "possession" issue he's having, too?" "I never said he was possessed." "You certainly got dodgy the last time it was brought up, but you're also speaking to someone who set up a massive exorcism circle to free myself from a dark god. Maybe doing something to actually help will kill two birds with one stone here."
Mamoru grumbled a little. This was not how he wanted his lunch hour to be. But... ... well, it isn't like he had a lot of choices when it came to this, huh. And he knew first-hand that Tarou wasn't lying about his own expertise. This should be a lot smaller, right?
"... if I said he was possessed, what would you do?"
"Well, my first move would be to ask if you knew what type of possession. If it's some errant spirit who's latched onto him, if you know of a conduit, how long it's been happening-- you know, little, simple details like that!" Tarou had already produced a notebook from who-knows-where, writing things down. "When I know more about it, I'll be able to create a proper sigil to match the purpose of this. After all, the only reason my exorcism didn't affect you, despite being pretty close to the Ground Zero of sorts, is because it didn't actually match your ailment! Not that I knew at the time, but all a learning process."
Mamoru sighed at the explanation. He was too excited about this, for him... but it was a little nostalgic, too. "It's like programming, isn't it? At least the type of magic you're performing here-- you have to know the functions that you want, the routines and subroutines, the result intended, and then you have to refine it. Right?"
----
"Isn't that right?" Akira spoke aloud. It was a rare moment that he was alone-- the test had gone well enough, but it had overloaded the system, so Akira had chased Lulu away so he could fix the AI. But he had a bit of company... in a sense.
"Yes, you understand the concept of how my "magic" works. I guess the idea isn't too far-fetched, once you accept the possibility, right?" A voice was coming out from the phone next to Akira-- or well, what he thought was the phone. Instead, the voice was in his own mind, channeling and filtering his perception. But the things Ren had to do to keep up the illusion...
"I'm surprised you asked about magic, though. You never seemed like the sort to be interested, right? How did you think I knew anything about it?"
"It was more of an impulse, but you just seemed dodgy and mysterious enough to have some sort of clue about it." "I'm hurt my that description, but I'll accept it all the same."
Ren leaned back in his seat, in the far-off location he was in, gesturing a little with his hand as marks appeared on it. "You might not be able to see it, but I'm doing "magic" right now. Programming and refining what I have in front of me, simply to make things more efficient. I already know what I want it to do, after all. But improvement is constant. I'm able to figure out more ways to reduce the "load", to spend less energy doing what I want. And it allows me to push more to do more, instead."
"Can anyone do magic?"
"I don't know, do you believe enough in magic to do it yourself?"
Akira twisted the screwdriver to tighten one of the screws, making sure the suspension on the AI machinery was still good. "I'm interested enough in it. Especially ever since she gave me that weird sequence-- it looked similar to one of the files that uncle has in the system, actually. Something about "dark games". But more... refined?"
"Given what you told me about that person, taking to heart what she's given you is maybe not the best of decisions." "I don't know, I'm still talking to you, aren't I?" "Once again, hurt at the assertion. But that's besides the point." Akira put down the screwdriver, cricking his neck a bit, getting up and stretching. But he was only half-aware that at this point, Ren had taken some control of his body.
"If you want to do "magic", you have to have a baseline to start from. For example, what's something small you want to have happen? What would you want to achieve?"
"Well, I guess I wouldn't mind some way to reinforce the machinery... it's a bother that the system's constantly overloaded whenever we do more intensive testing. But you said small, right? Maybe... something to make sure the bolts will stay tight, until I want them to be untightened?"
Ren let out a good-natured laugh. "Well, that's at least something small enough to start. Now, take a deep breath, and focus your hand. I can see about giving you a bit of help here--"
----
"-- I can give you some help here, with these details. Though you're sure you don't want to learn how to do this, yourself? Given, well, everything, you'd be a natural at this!"
Mamoru, whose patience was already pretty thin, shook his head. "I'm not interested adding on a skill like that quite yet, let alone from you. I'm not even sure if I can trust you, yet. But I don't have a lot of options to help Akira... and from what I can tell, any attempt to make him aware of this will go poorly. But..." He rubbed his chin a bit.
"He knows you tried to attack me. He already thinks poorly of you. If you approach him and do this, whoever is possessing him won't think of it as being cornered. Akira will instead think that you're just being hostile."
"You know, considering I'm still on probation, that isn't really the best of approaches, now is it?" "I'll make sure to explain to your parole officer about the situation." "That really puts my mind at ease, sure."
Even with their voices, their mannerisms being so different, their tones took on the same weary sound. But one thing was clear.
They wanted to help Akira, and Mamoru was willing to at least let Tarou have a shot at that.
"You do know, of course, that if you agree to do this, Akira will likely never forgive you, right?"
Tarou sighed a bit at that reality, rubbing his head. "He already seems like the type who won't forgive me for attacking you in the first place, right? Let's just call this the breaking off point. If the last thing I can do for him is to free him from the possession he's undergoing, well... What more could I ask for, for my nephew?"
"Long as you understand that.
Now get out of my house."